Maybe most important, help your child to see that he isn’t powerless in the situation. In other words, he failed the test because he didn’t study, not because he always fails tests and always will. Is clear that he brought the setback on himself, but it still doesn’t indicate anything about who he is, but how he chose to act in that one How can a setback be impersonal? Certainly, some bad things are just bad luck, and could have happened to anyone. This is not a referendum on my value as a person. They don’t indicate anything about any other part of his life. Help your child to choose to perceive setbacks as: To us is much less important than the story we tell ourselves about what happens to us. The essential trick is to remember that you perceive a setback any way you choose. This is so important that it bears repeating: What happens Teach your child the principles of Optimism. Powerlessness: "There is no real relationship between cause and effect things just happened I am the victim of what has occurred."ģ.Permanence: "This always happens and always will.".To deflate pessimism, challenge the four thought patterns that lead to pessimistic thinking: For example, they might say, "I won’t make any friends at this new school. Pessimistic thinking can be defined as expecting bad things to happen. Is pervasive, permanent, and personally directed at them? ( “Why does this always happen to me?") If you see that your child is pessimistic, Is the glass half full or half empty? When something bad happens, does your child see it as exemplary of their entire life, do they think the misfortune Notice how your child thinks about things. So how do you help your child to become more optimistic? 1. The bottom line is this: even if you are born with a tendency to pessimism, you can greatly increase your optimism quotient. Luckily, research shows that we can change the way we talk to ourselves about events and how we interpret them, which has a direct impact on our Unthinkingly influence us to interpret events in a negative way. There is also evidence, however, that we learn at an early age how to view the world and its potential from those around us, and that parents can Otherwise, why should he pullĬan you help your child become more optimistic? There is some evidence that optimism is an inherited trait, and certainly we know there is a biologicalīasis to much depression as well as to a tendency to be upbeat. When life seems to be dealing one blow after another, you want your child to believe that things can get better. Get fewer illnesses, have longer relationships, and live longer. Research shows that optimists, who believe they can achieve success, are in fact more able to do so. Have better lives, because even when times are hard, optimism is a cornerstone of resilience. The world needs optimists today more than ever, because we humans have a lot of problems that we need to solve. That things will work out, and that what we do can have a positive impact. To do that, we need a sense of optimism - the conviction Most to us, including the commitment to provide a calm, loving home for our children. But it IS possible, even in scary times, to be guided by the values that matter It's easy to feel frightened and overwhelmed in today's world.
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